And Then There Were Three
by CSI1983
Summary: Olivia doubts her ability to be a mother - P/O of course


_A/N - One thing I don't like is the space between season 4 and season 5. So, I tried to fill the gap._

_:)_

_Enjoy, read and review._

And Then There Were Three

When she had first found out, she was terrified. When she had broken the news to Peter, she saw his glimmer. She had been swept up in the joy of the moment as well but then the fear, cold and hard, settled in her stomach. How was she meant to do this? Peter seemed to adore the concept. He would spend hours talking to her stomach, even at the beginning when there was no physical evidence of her pregnancy. They would spend hours looking over the real estate section of the newspaper and gently argue about the sex of the little person growing inside of her. But in the back of her mind there was that voice, the one that told her that she could never be a mother. How would she know what to do? Thanks to Ella, she had some experience but being an Aunt was far easier than being a mother. At least as an Aunt when she got worried or unsure, she could hand Ella back. She felt weak admitting her fears. She felt weaker still about having them in the first place.

"Did you buy out the entire baby section or did you leave some for the other mothers too?"

Even she had to admit she went a little overboard. Peter's teasing was gentle; his hand soft on her rounded belly. She had carefully laid out the twelve new pregnancy books, fully intending to read through each one completely. Rachel was constantly in her ear telling her that it would all come naturally but Olivia doubted it. She picked out two of the slightly thinner books and handed them to Peter.

"I got these for you."

Peter glanced at the covers.

"_So You're Going To Be A Daddy _and _The Importance Of Fatherhood_? I would laugh but I get the feeling that you would hurt me. So I'll just say thank you."

"Wise move."

She settled herself against the pillows and started reading, stopping when she could feel Peter's eyes on her face.

"Yes?"

"What's with the books?"

She shrugged.

"Getting prepared."

Peter shifted, a frown on his face.

"No, something's up. It's been going on for a while now."

Olivia shook her head.

"Nothing is wrong."

"You are a terrible liar."

Olivia sighed and laid her book down over the bulge of her stomach.

"Fine. I'm scared. Terrified to be precise."

"Why?"

"I don't know. The concept of raising another human being could have something to do with it. I barely made it through my own childhood. How the hell are we meant to do this?"

Peter laughed. He actually laughed at her. She gave him a hard look until the laughter died on his lips. He turned onto his side and took her hand.

"You can face down some of the most evil people and creatures in this world but you are frightened of a child?"

When he said it out loud it sounded foolish. She felt the blush hit her cheeks and the easy tears come to her eyes. She sniffed and pulled her hand from Peter's grasp. This was another thing she hated about her pregnancy; the tears that came so easily. She had been reduced to a sobbing mess the other day when she couldn't find batteries for the remote. She was in such a state, Peter had thought something was seriously wrong.

"Don't make fun of me."

Peter sighed.

"Liv, you are going to be an incredible mother."

"How do you know that?"

"Because I know you.'

"And that's enough for you? Aren't you scared?"

Peter nodded slightly.

"Of course I am. But I know enough about us to know that this child is going to be the most loved person on this earth. Little Smuggle-"

"Smuggle?"

Peter shrugged.

"We haven't got a name yet and Smuggle is just plain cute."

Olivia arched her eyebrow.

"My pregnancy has made you weird."

"I was just thinking the same about you."

Olivia sighed and her hand went to her stomach, feeling the slight movement of the baby beneath her palm. She adored the little creature growing inside of her and she could picture the little person in her mind, a perfect combination of her and Peter. She just didn't want to screw it up. She wanted things to be perfect. They never would be but she wanted it that way regardless. Peter put his hand on top of hers.

"We can do this Liv."

Olivia studied him for a moment.

"Promise?"

Peter leaned forward and kissed her.

"I promise."

He snuggled closer to her and picked up the one of the books she had gotten him and started to read. After a moment, Olivia did the same, ignoring the little voice of doubt and pinning her fears on Peter's promise. He never broke his promises.

* * *

"Peter."

Olivia froze mid-step, halfway between the bathroom and the kitchen. She could hear him moving lightly, humming to himself. He was distracted.

"PETER!"

He was there a moment later, his face pale.

"What?"

"My water just broke."

Peter straightened, taking a second before he burst into action. He helped her to seat and started dashing from the bedroom to the front door, talking to himself. Olivia would have been laughing if the pain in her stomach hadn't been so consuming.

"Bag packed, need toothbrush, toothpaste. Oh you might want to wash your hair oh and you need soap."

"Peter, forget that. We can come back for that. We need to go to the hospital."

Peter stopped his movements nodding, helping Olivia out of the chair.

"But you need to put your pants on Peter."

"Shit."

Olivia bent over slightly, trying to remember the breathing exercises that had been drilled into her the last few months. Another wave of pain hit her and tightened her muscles. Peter was shimmering, brightly and consistently enough for her blood to pound harder in her ears. He had the small carry bag slung over his shoulder and Olivia leaned on him heavily as he took her to the car. This was a pain like she had never experienced before, fear that she could literally taste at the back of her throat. And it went on and on. The contractions were only minutes apart by the time they got to the hospital and Olivia was rushed off to the maternity ward. The pain medication that she had insisted on barely took the edge off. But the worse was to come. It was time to push. She bore down, Peter's voice encouraging in her ear. It went on and one, the hours slipping past, time lost in nothing but the pain and the short bursts of relief in between. She was exhausted. And then with one final push, it was over. There was this red, shrunken little creature that was her daughter, screaming at the coldness of the world. They placed the squirming creature on her chest, the red face still bunched from her entrance to the world. Olivia's heart tugged, forgetting the pain and placed a kiss on the wrinkled little forehead. She dozed, smiling as she heard Peter count fingers and toes, declaring their daughter the most beautiful creature in the world. She fell asleep to Peter's excited voice, telling Walter and Astrid the news.

* * *

When she woke up again, it was to the nurse and gentle shaking.

"Time for the little one to have her first meal."

Olivia shifted in the bed, her body complaining but she ignored it, slipping the hospital gown from her shoulder. Her daughter latched on easily and started sucking. Olivia took the moment of peace to examine her daughter, her tiny hand curled into a fist, her eyes tightly shut. The fear she felt was gone now. All she had to fear now was the world that was waiting for this fragile creature.

"Hello ladies."

Peter slipped into the room, a large bunch of flowers in his hand, a goofy grin on his face. He moved closer and gently stroked the fine fuzz on his daughter's head.

"Isn't she beautiful?"

"Yeah she is."

Peter kissed Olivia and she could taste the salt from his happy tears. He had been crying too.

"Just like her Mommy. So you know what this means right?"

"What?"

"We need a name. I think she may be mocked if we keep calling her Smuggle."

Olivia looked down at the baby.

"I don't think anything we discussed before works."

Peter slid onto the bed, his hand resting on her thigh.

"I think I have one."

"What?"

"Henrietta."

Olivia rolled the name over in her mind as she examined her daughter.

"Henrietta Bishop. I like it."

"Henrietta Elizabeth Bishop. After my mother."

Olivia smiled again.

"Etta for short."

Peter returned her grin. He stroked her hair, which was still damp from the labour.

"Do you believe me now?"

"About what?"

"About us being able to do this?"

Olivia looked down at the tiny person that she and Peter had created. Her doubt seemed foolish now. With Peter and Henrietta, anything seemed possible. And if it meant that goofy smile would remain on Peter's face, then she was willing to believe.


End file.
